I'm At War...

...for the second time this month with Mr. Sore-throat and Ms. Influenza. This time however, I think I'm gonna win becasause I've these fellas on my side:

The pharmacist said it's a seven-day battle so hopefully I come out on the winning side then.

I will blog about something more thought-provoking/insightful and of better content during the holidays when the madness of this "war" and my assignments are over. But for now, this is all I can manage..

Look Out Auckland City!

...and I'd like to apologize in advance for being a pain on the road. You should know I would not have done that intentionally =)

Bus Stop Sales

I was walking along Britomart (kinda like the Pasar Seni of Auckland City, except perhaps a wee more organized) the other day with one of my flatemates when I came across this on one of those floor spotlight thingamajigies:
The idea of this is basically, when the lights go on, the shape of that l'il bat will be reflected onto the of the bus stop. I thought it was a clever promotion...made me wonder if the local television networks go through this much 'trouble' to promote the shows they air on TV. I've not been back to KL in a while so I can't say for sure.

Oh, this was done by Television New Zealand, by the way (the equivalant to Malaysia's RTM).

Easy Silence

The view from my inner city appartment. I will sorely miss this place and the 2 people who make this flat even more special!

It's been ages I know, I know! Truth is, with so much work to be done (and the semester has just begun a month ago!) it's been so easy to not blog despite the many events that have happend in these few months. But, I'm not about to spend this little space with this whole I've-been-busy rigmarole.

I'm not going to say much either. I will leave you with this little thought I have though: Songwriting is an art that very few people have. Wait; let me rephrase that: GOOD songwriting is an art very few people have been blessed with. That said, I think Rebecca St. James and Brooke Fraser are probably two of the best writers around. I'm amazed at how such simple words speak so profoundly to my heart. I think what makes it so meaningful is the fact that they sing their own songs- personal interpretation just totally adds to it. This is really true when I listen to songs that make me go, "that's exactly how I feel, right there!"

A few weeks ago, my Radio lecturer asked everyone in my class if there was a band or song that describes us, what would it be. I wish I had Rebecca St. James' If I Had One Chance To Tell You Something because that's me right there; the whole album! I find it funny (not funny "ha-ha") and quite amazing at the same time. It feels good to know I'm not alone in this world; that there is at least one other person who identifies with me, or rather I identify with- since she had it in her to pen down her thoughts and make it into a well-selling (if that's even a phrase) record at that!

p.s: The blue and yellow thing sticking out at the far left in the picture above is Auckland's pride and joy: The Sky Tower. I want to bungee jump from the mid point some day- before my 25th birthday.

Anger Management

If you've been a university or college student long enough, you would have, at one point or another, come to realize that the social circles run very differently as compared to high school. In high school, it's fairly simple to put almost every individual into various categories and box them up into streotypical social groups. Such groups include the athletes, beauty queens, cheerleaders, bitches, geeks, football/basketball teams, the 'emo' people, the ones who need a boost in their self-esteem and a whole lot of other sub categories that I can't seem to think of at the moment but am sure exist. Then there certain elite individuals that eventually become a brand of their own like the leading man of the soccer/rugby/basketball team and the captain of the cheerleading squad or the high school slut. You should know that I'm just expressing an opinion with no prior research on this matter as I came from a high school in the East. The above statements are made solely from the knowlege of what the media has fed me over the years.

Anyway, back to where I was. Things change when you move on to university. All those little circles link hands and become three big circles: the really academically brilliant ones, the slightly above average ones (I like to think I fall in this category) and my personal dislike, the ones who just couldn't give a rat's ass about what happens. The last kind is the worst because in matters pertaining to group work, they're the ones who, *insert suitable adjective here* the crap out of you? (I don't know how to say it politely!)

Unfortunately, I've had the "pleasure" of working with some of these fellas and let me tell you, patience? Not an easy Feat! The idea that they can be so irresponsible and not turn up for appointments and (what I hate the most) not answer messages/calls is beyond my comprehension! Honestly, I'm so over wroking in groups! Over it! I'm silently praying that karma will bite them back in the ass real hard. I know it's mean of me to do that but seriously, I wish they'd just establish thier lack of propriety early on in the assignment so I know they're not dependable and do something about it sooner.

I was so amazed at how angry I was with a certain partner of mine. I remember how my girlfriends in high school use to joke that I walked aound as if there was a little thunder cloud with a lightning bolt above my head. It's been almost 6 years since I felt like that....till yesterday. I swear, I would not have hesitated to shoot this person had I a gun and that's when I realized the enormity of my anger. Right then, I realized if it happened again, I just may have to go for anger management sessions. Yeah, it was THAT bad and I'm in no way trying to blow it out of proportion. The only saving grace this person had was his really gorgeous eyes- the kind that just might make you go weak in the knees if you stare into it long enough...which is why I almost never look him in the when we're talking.

God, please grant me the patience to deal with these people, the will to control my anger that I will not say something I will later regret, the courage to tell them how I feel and the strength to sustain me through the week.

Do. Something.

I don't know if I'm saying what I'm about to say because television drama has got the best out of me. Perhaps He intentionally authored this chapter of my life that I would be almost forced to go back to Him and have that long impending chat I promised Him a while back. But anyway, back to what I am about to say: If you are an avid follower of the recent Hollywood invention that took the TV world by storm with its intriguing plot and critical acclaim, not to mention certain characters who are, how shall I say, very easy on the eyes...I'm sure you know the now dead Isacc Mendez of 'Heroes' who had the ability to paint the future (forget the fact that he needed to get all high to do that).

Many times this past weeks, I have been made to question how sure am I of my direction in life and wish Mendez's fictional being extended to the reality of my world so he would paint me a picture of my future- let me know if I'm on the right path. And if I'm not then at the very least I would have had the chance to do it over and get it right the next time. I wish Mendez would paint me what it is that will happpen to me in the next 20 years (I'm not even asking for my whole lifetime). I'd even pay for the canvas, paints and brushes! I am aware that art supplies aren't exactly the cheapest things around. (this is where you're supposed to laugh in case you didn't get it) Just tell me what the future holds for me.

Will I become the television producer and director I've always wanted to become? Should I even be DOING television? Maybe I should be persuing my initial dream of wanting to become a journalist and write those "hit 'em where it hurts" kind of pieces about war, abject poverty, corruption, greed, so-called democracy, etc. I used to think that if I became a journalist, I could make a difference- make people see that some people's comfort and happiness doesn't have to cost someone else thiers. That no matter where on earth we are born, we are still equal and that the color of our skin or the clothes we wear or the place we come from don't dictate our place in society.

But somewhere along the way, I lost sight of that dream. Somewhere along the way, people kept telling me that I could write about the things that matter all I wanted, till the cows came home, but the world will always be the same. Somewhere along the way, I decided that I was going to kill that dream. But perhaps I could still revive that dream, still persuing a career in television. After all, it is still under the same umbrella of mass-media, no?

All these questions and not many (if any!) answers. From little things like, 'Should I study abroad for a semester next year' or 'is the weather gonna go all crazy again today' or 'what do I wear to uni' to bigger ones like, 'should I find a job right after graduation' or 'should I take a few years off to work for an NGO' or 'will my paper qualification be of any help to me if I want to work with kids in Rwanda or India' to life altering questions like, 'will I be 35 and still single and alone' or 'is there actually going to be a Mr. Man in the picture' and 'will I have this Mr. Man to go home to and rest my head on his lap and whine about the terrible day that I had but it's all much better now because he's here' or 'will there be little Mr. Mans and Naveenas around'. Ok, so maybe I should stop watching telly drama, but still...you get the picture?

The point is, I don't know if I'm doing everything I'm supposed to be doing to secure a happy future. I'm not sure. I have hope but I'm not sure. I know you could easily point out that none of us are ever sure about the future and that's what makes it the future. I know you would if you knew me well enough. You would slap me on the arm and tell me to just trust God and have faith. You would tell me to stop complaining and live in the 'now' rather than the 'future' because life is too short to worry about tomorrow. But truth is, I honestly think it's much easier said than done. It's actually quite a scary word, that one- FUTURE.

God, I want to trust You. I want to trust that everything will be okay because You say that plans You have for my future are plans to prosper and not harm me. I want to believe that you know where the end of the road is for me, because You have better foresight than I ever will. Lord, I want to have complete faith in You. I. want. to.

But I can't. I'm having trouble in that area because You're not giving me any sign of it all being okay. I'm have a problem with You making me wait because You're not doing anything to help with my certainty. Lord, I need you to show me something. Anything. Just show. me. something. I know You're working on me and that Your hand is always on my life, but right now, I need You to do something to show me it's going to be alright. You know my needs and wants and You've heard my questions (I KNOW YOU HAVE! Don't deny it). Now I need you to help me figure it out. I'm here at your feet asking You to help me figure this out. Do Something. It's all I ask. That You would please just do. something.

I am Waiting

I am a strong independant woman (who's still just a girl at times) who will wait upon God to bring me the man He has chosen for me. I will be patient and wait for Him to bring him to me and I will (try to) accept the fact that perhaps either him or me aren't ready for each other and I so I will wait...so help me God.

Now, all I have to do is keep reciting this and I'll be fine.

Or so I hope.

Not so Much the Baby Anymore

This is the girl that was to be born a boy....or so the pediatrician thought. I guess God had other plans.

This is the little person that use to steal wooden spoons and ladles, pretending she was Nigela Lawson. She can't cook to save her life!

This is the brat that turned my world upside down when she arrived at the hospital, sucking her fingers even before anyone else saw her in the baby room. Now, she's not so much the irritant she used to be.

This is my sister, Petrina. A plan constucted 15 years ago and is still His working progress.

Happy Birthday, Bee! Love you heaps!

Everywoman- Apostasy

I was appaled by this thing I saw on Youtube. I will neither comment nor make blind statements just because I've not done a thorough research on this matter. Do watch it and tell me what you think. I WILL give my two cents when I take a breather after my essays and presentations...in about two weeks. By then, this case may already have been resolved...oh well.

And tommorow, I'll try and post up some pictures of my holiday; just so you know this blog is still active =)

Till then, here's the link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgnncfYRPxk

Bad, Bad Naveena

It's that time again- that time of the semester where suddenly spring cleaning your room becomes something you HAVE to do today, even though it's autmn now. Suddenly, you realize you haven't caught up with so many friends and you go blog surfing just to see what they've been up to. Then there are all these TV shows that are suddenly so interesting you can't take your eyes off the idiot box, when previously those very same shows would put you to sleep.

Yes, folks. It's that time of the semester for me- assignments are coming to their deadlines and as usual, I've barely started. I was gonna pull and all-nighter to finnish one yesterday, but after a walk along the infamous K'road (don't ask me what I was doing there and no, I wasn't drinking), I decided against it and went to bed at 10pm, thinking I will have an early start today, but here I am- blogging. Gosh, I'm so bad, aren't I? Normally finnishing an assignment 2 days before the given deadline would be perfectly normal for me. But there's a catch this time; I've another paper due two days right after at 10am.

So, here's to a long day and an even longer night. I should probably buy a bottle of instant coffee...or I could just pop by the cafe 5 minutes away and get one to go. But for now, I think black tea would have to suffice, Earl Grey, no less =)

Cheers!

Home and Away

I moved out of my father's house and into my own appartment yesterday. In the words of a friend, this is "one big step for Naveena, one giant leap for Indian-kind", you know, because I moved out before getting married. For those of you who find this difficult to understand, let me put it this way; It's unusual t move out of your parents' house before you get married in the Indian culture and unless they disown you, there really is no need (or to some no WAY) to live n your own.

That said, I myself had to face the huge hurdle of convincing them that it would be better off letting me go (there was plenty of crying on my part and initial disapproving looks on their part). I must have done a decent job at it because, here I am in my stark cold appartment room. It was suppsed to be one of the happiest day of my life but instead, I felt like everyone else's misery was gathered up and dropped on me like a ton of bricks. Not so good an analogy but whatever. I mean, independance is supposed to be a good thing. Someone else also told me if I could help get her 25 year-old son out of her house! She reckons it's a good thing. And she is right. I know she is. But I'm not so sure I made the right choice.

Don't get me wrong, I'm loving the fact that I now don't have to drag myself out of bed at 5.30am for an 8am class. The library is just minutes away. All I have to do is step out of the appartment and the whole city is mine for the taking. I can do anything at virtually any time I please. But as I layed on my big white bed, starring at at my lava lamp trying to fall asleep, I couldn't help but feel a little bit like crap. It doesn't help that I'm not too happy about my appartment either. It felt more like a cold hotel room rather than an actual homey (if that's even a word!) personal space. Perhaps I should look for another place, but then again it's only been a couple of days.

Only time will tell. For now though, Micheal Buble's "Home" echoes in my mind, every word of it. Let me go home. I've got to come home.

None but Jesus

It's been a while since I had a listen to anything new from Hilsong United, only because I have not bought anything new. So today, when I got my hands on their "United we Stand" album I was psyched! Super late, I know...and there was this one song in particular that just gripped me. It's a faily simple song but the words were so powerful. Well, I thought so anyway. You know, it's just one of those songs that you can't explain just what IT is but IT is just there. thought I'd post it up here. I absolutely recomend buying the album- really awesome set of songs!

In the quiet, in the stillness

I know that You are God

In the secret of Your presence

I know there I am restored

When You call I won’t refuse

Each newday again I’ll choose

There is no one else for me

None but Jesus

Crucified to set me free

Now I liveto bring Him praise

In the chaos, in confusion

Iknow You’re Sovereign still

In the moment of my weakness

You give me grace to do Your will

When You call I won’t delay

This my song through all my days

All my delight is in You Lord

All of my hope, all of my strength

All my delight is in You Lord

Forevermore!

None but Jesus, Hilsong United, 2006 (I think)

Lessons and a Beautiful Stranger

Gosh, I can't believe it's already the third month of the year! Excuse the cliched and over-used phrase but seriously, I'm still getting over the new year and my course, let alone the month! I had an intense week and I learnt a few important lessons.

The first being that one of the most important rule in TV land is NEVER FORGET TO HAVE AT LEAST 5 SCONDS OF PRE-ROLE before and after a shot! Either I didn't bother to pay attention in class, or nobody told me that; I'm banking on the latter =) As a result, post production was a huge problem- I'd rather not bother with the details- and come submission, all I can say is I didn't like the final outcome that we handed in. I think it may very well be grade altering. It was an expensive lesson which I don't intend to repeat. EVER! Better now than in the middle of my first career defining movie I suppose...but I'd like to sulk about it a little more. I'm not ready to move on just yet. Perhaps at the end of the week. Perhaps in a few more hours. Perhaps.

But, on a totally different note, I did something I never thought I'd ever do. See, I've always been a wee bit shy when it comes to meeting total strangers. It's usually no more than an acquaintanceship (yes, it IS a word; I checked!) and it takes me quite a while to move past that into the friendship stage. However, I was at the movies the other day by myself when I was walking away from the ticket counter after purchasing "Notes on a Scandal" (bad movie; I wonder how it received nominations at the recent awards season). There was this someone who was pacing the lobby, clearly still undecided on what he was going to watch. From a simple "not sure what to watch?", we snowballed into a nearly 2 hour conversation about nothing and (almost) everything at the same time. I was blown away by the fact that I actually held up a chat for so long with a total and complete stranger; a regular passer-by. Apparently, he was too. I surprised myself. It was a good surprise though.

Life really is filled with little surprises that come every now and again. I think it's these little surprises that make all the difference in the world. On that note, have a super weekend while I become a total geek for another weekend. I've plenty of readings to catch up on, which will prove to be quite challenging seeing as how I was so looking forward to putting my feet up and sipping wine and having some downtime this weekend...

Jesus and Anna Nicole Smith

I'm sure many of you would have heard about the whole James Cameron finding Jesus' coffin shebang. I was of course, personally really skeptical about it, as I always am about issues like this. For those of you who have no idea what this is all about, allow me to shed some light. James Cameron has aparently made documentary, claiming that he has foun Jesus' remains, alog with those of Mary Magdeline and a little baby, Judah, who was alegedly the son of Jesus.

Today, while I was on my way home from university after a bitch of day, I heard something on the radio that totally made my day, in regards to this issue. One of the disc jockeys played an excerpt from a recent Jay Leno Show. This is what Jay Leno said (well, not verbatim, but something along these lines)

"Apparently they can do a DNA test and prove that Jesus was the father of this child. I mean, ... (really)...they can't even determine who the father of Anna Nicole Smith's child is!"

And that just totally made me laugh out loud...before realizing I probably looked like a lunatic sitting in a bus-load of people smiling like a crazy person. Oh well, but it was so worth it. I reckon it was the best thing I heard all day, and beleve me, I DID hear a lot of things!

It never ceases to amaze me how people are always trying to disprove the fact that Jesus is not who He says He is. Why?